I have to make this brief, as it's almost 4 am and I have to get up for work at 6:30, but....

Does anyone ever feel like other's stupidity affects their day to day life?

Well I do. I work at Macy's, otherwise known as stupidity capital. I have to deal with the morons coming in and out of King's Plaza Monday through Friday, non-stop. They're dumb, simple minded, ignorant. The employees, the customers, everyone. Seems to me like all freakin' day all I deal with is stupidity. Kevin (my very intelligent coworker) and I agree. Cory also likes to tell me about the idiots he has to deal with at his job, we laugh, have a good time, but who's really suffering here?

So I come to my main point. As some of you know, I watch very little TV. I find it hard to get attached to TV shows, mostly because I think they're all the same and I get tired of the same shit, different smell rigamarole. Family Guy is and will be (until it's canceled.....again....) the only tried and true show in my life. Pushing Daisies has become another tried and true, because it is witty, quick paced, packed with action and a really great cast. Tonight Dee and I finished off the rest of the pre-canceled season we had recorded and now I'm pissed pissed pissed. We had the last three aired episodes recorded on our DVR and were holding off because the episode preceding those three had fucked up on the DVR and we were gonna have to catch it on the computer. So we figured, what the hell, we'll watch that one and a couple we have recorded. Well, turns out we were like, hey let's just finish it, these are all really good freaking episodes (thus, why I am up so late) (worth it, I think). Well, we're going through the episodes, and the only thought going through my head is, why would they cancel such a great fucking show?

I'll tell you why. Because the average American is a moron. This show, this great fucking show, is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy too fast for the average American. They'd rather watch the 55th season of The Bachelor. They can't follow the story, the dialogue, or the witty puns. Morons.

So, once again, I find myself suffering at the hands of idiot America. I find one good show and they fucking cancel it.

I think a small part of my subconscious was preventing me from watching the taped episodes because it knew that this would happen.

So, who supports sterilization?

::raises hand::

I'll do a music meme.

1. Put your iTunes on shuffle.
2. Post a random line from the first 40 songs that play. (obviously I skipped the instrumental songs lol)
3. Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly.
4. DON'T CHEAT.

1. You caught me in a lie, I have no alibi.
2. I may be dumb, but I'm not a dweeb.
3. I'll laugh until my head comes off, I'll swallow till I burst.
4. Those days, of warm rains come rushing back to me.
5. Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright.
6. There's no man in town as admired as you, you're everyone's favorite guy.
7. You realize the sun doesn't go down, it's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round.
8. Cause if my baby don't love me no more, I know her sister will! (OMG love this song, so glad it came on)
9. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH WHAT A WOOKIE!
10. And you hate your boss at your job, well in your dreams you can blow his head off.
11. I am in love with the things that I see in his face, it's a memory I know time will never erase.
12. The chills that you spill up my back, keep me filled with satisfaction when we're done, satisfaction of what's to come.
13. We will arise from the bunkers, by land, by sea, by Dirigible.
14. My roommate Nick is an ignorant ball head.
15. She might be with him, but she's thinkin' bout me, me, me.
16. Get out, get out of my life, and let me sleep at night. (I'll accept either artist.)
17. So let the love tear us apart, I've found the cure for a broken heart.
18. Honey when you knocked on my door, I gave you my key.
19. And when you're out in the cold, no one beside you, and no one to hold, am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me.
20. Excess ain't rebellion, you're drinking what they're selling, your self-destruction doesn't hurt them, your chaos won't convert them.
21. Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple, sometimes goodbye's the only way.
22. We go where we like, we got over time, we get paid to rattle our chains.
23. If you could watch everybody work, while you just lay on your back, would you do it?
24. With my body and soul, I want you more than you'll ever know.
25. There's nothing I wouldn't do to have just one more chance to look into your eyes, and see you looking back.
26. Walk around the club with yo thumb in ya mouth, put my dick in, take your thumb out.
27. I burn an orphanage just to bring heat to you bastards.
28.I have no choice but to confess that I've been desperately trying to belong, lying to myself and everybody else.
29. Had it been another day I might have looked the other way and I'd have never been aware, but as it is I'll dream of her tonight.
30. Foxx flippin', Webbie smokin' and we chokin' on a whole pound of purple famous like tha ninja turtles.
31. Take your time, don't live too fast, troubles will come and they will pass.
32. Tell me I'm the only one, and then I might never be the lonely one.
33. Get a load of this, she's always bitching at me when I'm feeling down.
34. Hand me the world on a silver platter and what good would it be with no one to share.
35. We did just what you told us, lost our faith along the way and found ourselves believing your lies.
36. So much for all your high brow Marxist ways, just use me up and then you walk away.
37. I step off the train, I'm walking down your street again.
38. Birthday boy, birthday girl. Combichrist, evil nice.
39. Its hard to believe that there's nobody out there, its hard to believe that I'm all alone.
40. Well, my heart went "boom" when I crossed that room, and I held her hand in mine.

Enjoy!
 

So I just spent the better part of the last hour crying.

So you know, it didn't come out of nowhere, there was a purpose.

I don't know how many of you remember The Land Before Time. I watched it a TON when I was a kid, I believe it was a gift from my grandparents, and I'm also pretty sure I saw it in theatres. The point is, I can't recall a movie that reminds me more of my childhood. And it came on HBO at 7 pm. I haven't seen it...in years. I don't even know how many cause it's been so long. I'd go so far as to say it's probably been at least 10.

I believe that the tears are a combination on three things. First, it's been a good while since I really cried. I think the last time was when I watched P.S. I Love You with Dee. It was my first time seeing it and I was extremely hormonal, and the movie is sad as all hell, so down came the buckets. And that was about a month ago. I'm a strong believer in crying as therapy, a sort of way to let it all out, so they were bound to come any day now. Second reason, the story itself is far from cheerful. Littlefoot loses his mother, and there's all this seperation from family and loneliness (oh god, the loneliness), and that makes me think of how lonely I am and how seperated I feel from my family. Which sort of brings me to my third point. With as busy as we've been, moving and starting our lives here on our own, and getting jobs, I haven't had much time to think about how scary and depressing a thing it is to grow up. College is an in-between point, cause you're on your own, but you're still dependent for financial stability, you don't have any real bills to pay, you still go home for holidays, etc. 

I think tonight was the first time I've ever mourned the loss of my childhood. 

I miss my friends, playing with my brother in the snow, playing on the playground, field trips, field day, high school lip syncs, marching band, concert band.....I could probably sit here all night and think of things that I'd rather do tomorrow than get up and go to my day job, bust my ass for money and worry about what I'm going to spend it on. Or worry about what I'm eating this week. Or waking up on time. Or making myself go to bed at the right time (which I will not do, btw).

Not that I don't love my life right now. I love being independent, doing what I want, when I want (unless I'm working of course, lol.), I love my job (though I don't get paid enough, I think) and I love being in a new place, with so much potential.

But like I said, it was overdue anyways. And it is that time of the month. So maybe my brain is just a little haywire now, lack of sleep and hormones galore. But it felt good to get it out. So I'm okay. I don't want people getting concerned. I just wanted to comment on growing up and how crazy it can get. And what a fucking girl I am.

Also, thanks to HBO for throwing that movie out of left field. Jerks. Catching a girl off guard like that.

Well, Christmas has come and gone. It was fairly depressing up to the day itself, but it's over now and I can relax.

Good haul this year. Like, REALLY good haul.

I got:
- a new laptop! (which I am making my first post from as I speak...er, type...)
- a Nikon Coolpix camera (I needed a new one, my old Kodak crapped out on me)
- a X-Box 360, from my real dad (no Halo 3 but I'm working on that)
- two movies, Goodfellas (omg so excited) and Little Miss Sunshine
- new Stewie pajama pants, fleece! so I don't get cold (my parents were on their game this year)
- a little angel ornament, from a series I get every year, very adorable

The laptop is dead sexy. All sleek and smooth and shiny. Also, it's a beast. Huge. Screen is 17 freakin' inches. So, I named it Sexy Beast. Appropriate, I think. I'm in the process of moving all my data from the old laptop, and getting all the settings the way I like it. I've been using K-meleon web browser and I still need to figure out how to import my Favorites from that. The best thing, I think at least, after having such a small hard drive on my old one, is all the space I have on this one. So, I'm working hard to fill that up, lol. Also, it's soooooooo much faster than the IBM. Love love love it. It's my baby.

The camera is awesome as well, 10 megapixels, super awesome zoom of closeness (seriously, I could spot some skin cells...) very sleek little black number.

The 360 was unexpected, to say the least. When I get my Halo 3, it's all over. You guys probably won't hear from me for months. And after I get Grand Theft Auto IV I'll fall into another black hole. Still debating on whether or not to keep the system out in the living room with the big TV, or move it into my room, so as not to hog the TV. I dunno.

Well, I must go grocery shopping, we're all out of TP.

Love!

I didn't get the chance to post last night cause I was tired, and I need to get ready for work in a couple minutes. But...

Family Guy SIngs! was a great freakin' show, no bullshitting. Basically the show consisted of a reading of their 100th episode, "Stewie Kills Lois" interjected with songs throughout. All of these were hilarious, the most hilarious being Mike Henry's rendition of "Somewhere That's Green", sung as Herbert the Pervert. I was laughing so hard I was crying. The reading was awesome too. I have to say, it's amazing to see Seth switching so effortlessly from Brian to Stewie to Peter and such. After the show, Dee and I hung around by the stage entrance hoping to get at least a picture with Seth. Alex Borstein came out and did pictures with all the fans out there (there were like 20, not a whole lot) and both Dee and I got pictures with her. Danny Smith also came out and signed autographs and took pictures, Dee managed to snap a shot of him as well. We waited around a bit longer waiting for the rest to come out. Mila Kunis came out quickly, not signing anything. They rushed that group out so fast I didn't see him until he was in the car, but Macaulay Culkin was there as well, I had forgotten til I saw him that he and Mila were together. But yeah, they rushed Seth Green out just the same, didn't get to see him either. Then when they brought Seth MacFarlane out I thought maybe he'd at least stop for a couple minutes, but he rushed right to his car. So, as I told Dee later, if I ever meet him, I'm going to kick him smartly in the shin, then offer to have sex with him. Lol.

But yeah, still a great show. Yay! One of the best birthday gifts ever. Thanks Dee!

Ok, now I have to go to work. Exciting.

A great victory tonight! Not only for democrats, but for our country. I strongly believe that Obama is the best choice for change. Most of you that know me well know that I was rooting for Hilary's victory, but Obama was my second choice and I'm glad that he won. His speech was uplifting and moving, and had me bawling like a baby. I truly hope that Obama will do great things for our country, as he said he would. The fact that he is black is proof to me that our country has changed and is ready to move forth into a better place, one where everyone can live together in peace, regardless of color, religion, gender, or sexual orientation. I can't tell you how long I've wished for a world like the one we are on our way to.

Yes we can!

...that the year is close to being over.

And to be honest, I'm not happy about the way my year is turning out. The only good thing really has been my move up to New York, which in itself was great, but there are things about moving that are complicated and difficult. I'm really tired of being unemployed, and I can't express how depressing it is to not be able to get a job with a college degree. And not even a good job, just no job in general. I've gotten a little freelance, which is cool, but unless I don't get more work soon, I'm not going to have enough to pay for rent. And I'm going to have to ask my parents for help then. Which I don't want to do.

I'm trying to be positive about things, but that gets harder every day. It's like I'm floating in a hot air balloon that's slowly losing altitude. But not slowly enough to not crash and crumble when it hits the ground.

In other news, my 24th is coming up in a little more than a month. First off, let me express how old I feel. I know I'm not, and you're all going to tell me, "Oh no Kristi, it's no big deal, you're still young." But you know what? I still feel old. Once I'm 24, there will be only one year left until my 25th, and by then I will have lived a quarter of my life span. And even that is assuming that I'll live to the age of ancient.

Better though, there are some kick ass things coming out around my birthday. Twilight and the new 007 flick, Quantum of Solace both come out on the 21st, day before my birthday. I can't tell which one I'm more excited about. Cause I love Daniel Craig and I think he's dead sexy (Dee would disagree) and would most definitely f-t-s out of him. But then there's Twilight, with the super hot RPatz. And um, hi? It's about vampires. Nuff said.

But most exciting for me, and one reason I am SO happy to be in NY right now, is Family Guy Sings!, a new show showcasing the songs from the show, sung by the cast members themselves! It's showing the 24th and 25th of Nov. And who wants to guess what I'm doing after it's over? Yeah I'll be sticking around, trying to hook up with Mr. Seth Macfarlane, who in my opinion is an ideal match for myself. Atheist, democrat, supports gay rights, and uh, oh yeah, he only created the best show ever! I'll catch you guys at Carnegie Hall on the 24th.

I'm going to create, trying to win some design contests. To view my work, if anyone is interested, http://twiggster84.deviantart.com/.

Night folks! I'm gonna go play some Halo I think.

All I want is to prove to my parents that I can survive without them. And life won't let me do that.

Well fuck you, life. Fuck you hardcore.

 Cat's out of the bottle...

Um.......wait.....that's.............

Yeah, I can't brain today.

I've been out of sorts all day, slightly delirious, a little tired...

Also, starting to feel depressed because I can't get a job in the major I graduated in. 

Also, apartment hunting sucks.

Also, I need sex.

Can anyone get me any of these things?

I know there's a couple of you anyways.

Made a new icon, it's brilliant, I know. 

First day of work tomorrow. Scary!